Tail Light on Bike
On Christmas morning, a cop on horseback was sitting at a traffic light. Next to him was a kid on his shiny new bike.
The cop said to the kid, "Nice bike you've got there. Did Santa bring that to you?"
The kid said, "Yeah."
The cop said, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a taillight on that bike." The cop then proceeded to issue the kid a $20 bicycle safety violation ticket.
The kid took the ticket, but before he rode off he said, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?"
Humoring the kid, the cop said, "Yeah, he sure did."
The kid said, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."
Yo mama is so fat, her picture fell off the wall!
What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede?
Bacon and legs!
Why do men have holes at the end of their penises?
So oxygen can get to their brains.
| A Lawyer and A Politician | |
What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician?
Chelsea Clinton.
Yo Mama's so ugly, on halloween, she had to trick-or-treat over the phone!
Why can't Chinese couples have white babies? Because two Wongs don't make a white!
Q: What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde's ear ? A: Data transfer.
| Rumored Corporate Mergers | |
It has long been rumored that W. R. Grace Co. was considering buying the Fuller Brush Co. along with Mary Kay Cosmetics and then merge with the Hale Business Systems. This mega-corporate entity could be known as Hale Mary Fuller Grace. Failed merger: Yahooand Netscape. Net 'n Yahoo didn't work out because they would have to relocate theheadquarters located in Tel Aviv. Proposed merger: Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers, to be called Fairwell Honeychild. Rumored merger: Wurlitzer with Xerox. They are going to market reproductive organs. Possible merger: Warner Brothers, Polygraph Records and Keebler -- to be called...Poly-Warner-Cracker. 3M and Goodyear merger: mmmGood John Deere andAbitibi-Price: Deere Abi Zippo Manufacturing, Audi,Dofasco and Dakota Mining: Dip Audi Do Da Swissair andCheseborough-Ponds: Swisschese Honeywell, Imasco and HomeOil: Honey, I'm Home Luvs Diapers and HertzRent-a-Car: Luv Herts Upjohn and Chuckie CheesePizza: UpChuck White Castle Burgers andGlad Trash Bags: White Trash Bags
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